{"id":103325,"date":"2025-07-24T11:00:08","date_gmt":"2025-07-24T08:00:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mersingazetesi.com\/?p=103325"},"modified":"2025-07-24T17:18:30","modified_gmt":"2025-07-24T14:18:30","slug":"bu-duvar-tanidik-bir-yerlerden-gene","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mersingazetesi.com\/index.php\/2025\/07\/24\/bu-duvar-tanidik-bir-yerlerden-gene\/","title":{"rendered":"BU DUVAR TANIDIK B\u0130R YERLERDEN GENE"},"content":{"rendered":"<div>\n<div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Bu duvar tan\u0131d\u0131k bi yerden gene\u2026<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Nurcan, ko\u011fu\u015fun so\u011fuk beton duvar\u0131na s\u0131rt\u0131n\u0131 dayam\u0131\u015f, g\u00f6zlerini tavana\u00a0dikmi\u015f, \u00f6ylece duruyor. Hani bazen insan bir \u015feye bakar da asl\u0131nda hi\u00e7bir\u00a0\u015fey g\u00f6rmez ya, i\u015fte o halde. Duvar\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcndeki \u00e7atlaklar\u0131 ezberlemi\u015f\u00a0art\u0131k. Her gece, uykunun k\u0131y\u0131s\u0131na gelip de dalmadan \u00f6nce, o \u00e7atlaklarda\u00a0kayboluyor. Sanki her biri bir yol, her biri d\u0131\u015far\u0131ya, evine, \u00e7ocuklar\u0131na\u00a0uzanan bir patika. Ama de\u011fil. Hepsi ayn\u0131 yere \u00e7\u0131k\u0131yor: bu d\u00f6rt duvara.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Nurcan, k\u0131rk\u0131na yeni basm\u0131\u015f, iri yar\u0131, elleri nas\u0131rl\u0131 bir adam. Y\u00fcz\u00fcnde,\u00a0gen\u00e7ken hep g\u00fclen bir \u00e7ocu\u011fun izleri var, ama \u015fimdi o izler derin\u00a0\u00e7izgilerle g\u00f6lgelenmi\u015f. Sakallar\u0131 uzam\u0131\u015f, a\u011farmaya ba\u015flam\u0131\u015f.\u00a0Hapishanenin havas\u0131 m\u0131, yoksa i\u00e7indeki a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131k m\u0131 beyazlatt\u0131, bilmiyor.\u00a0Belki de ikisi birden. \u00dc\u00e7 y\u0131l oldu, su\u00e7suz yere buraya d\u00fc\u015feli. Bir\u00a0yanl\u0131\u015fl\u0131k, bir kar\u0131\u015f\u0131kl\u0131k, bir iftira\u2026<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Ad\u0131n\u0131 ne koyarsan koy, sonu\u00e7 ayn\u0131: Nurcan i\u00e7eride, ailesi d\u0131\u015far\u0131da.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">D\u0131\u015far\u0131da, k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir kasabada, iki \u00e7ocu\u011fu ve kar\u0131s\u0131 Ay\u015fe var. B\u00fcy\u00fck o\u011flu\u00a0Mert, on d\u00f6rt ya\u015f\u0131nda, tam ergenli\u011fin orta yerinde. K\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck k\u0131z\u0131 Zeynep ise\u00a0sekizine yeni bast\u0131. Nurcan, Zeynep\u2019in do\u011fum g\u00fcn\u00fcn\u00fc ka\u00e7\u0131rd\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131\u00a0d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fck\u00e7e bo\u011faz\u0131 d\u00fc\u011f\u00fcmleniyor. Ay\u015fe, her g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015f g\u00fcn\u00fcnde \u201c\u00c7ocuklar iyi,\u201d\u00a0diyor, \u201cMert okula gidiyor, Zeynep\u2019in resimleri \u00e7ok g\u00fczel.\u201d Ama Nurcan\u00a0biliyor, Ay\u015fe\u2019nin sesindeki titremeyi saklamaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131. Biliyor,\u00a0\u00e7\u00fcnk\u00fc o titremeyi kendi y\u00fcre\u011finde de hissediyor.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Bu ak\u015fam ko\u011fu\u015f sessiz. Yan ranzada yatan \u0130smail horluyor, ama Nurcan ona\u00a0al\u0131\u015ft\u0131 art\u0131k. \u0130lk geldi\u011finde o horultular y\u00fcz\u00fcnden sabaha kadar g\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc\u00a0k\u0131rpmazd\u0131. \u015eimdi ise o ses, tuhaf bir \u015fekilde huzur veriyor. Sanki bir\u00a0hat\u0131rlatma: Hayat devam ediyor, bir \u015fekilde. Nurcan, yast\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131na\u00a0saklad\u0131\u011f\u0131 k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir foto\u011fraf\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131yor. Ay\u015fe\u2019nin, \u00e7ocuklarla \u00e7ekti\u011fi son\u00a0foto\u011fraf. Mert\u2019in surat\u0131 as\u0131k, belli ki poz vermek istememi\u015f. Zeynep ise\u00a0g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u00fcyor, ama g\u00f6zleri biraz mahzun. Nurcan, parma\u011f\u0131yla foto\u011fraf\u0131n\u00a0\u00fcst\u00fcnden ge\u00e7iyor, sanki \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131n y\u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc ok\u015fayabiliyormu\u015f gibi.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">\u201cZeynep\u2019im,\u201d diye m\u0131r\u0131ldan\u0131yor, \u201cBaban burada, k\u0131z\u0131m. Hep burada.\u201d Sesini kendi bile zor duyuyor. Ko\u011fu\u015fta a\u011flamak ay\u0131p de\u011fil, ama Nurcan g\u00f6zya\u015flar\u0131n\u0131 i\u00e7ine g\u00f6mmeyi \u00f6\u011frendi. \u0130lk aylarda, geceleri yast\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 \u0131slat\u0131rd\u0131. \u015eimdi ise a\u011flamak yerine, i\u00e7indeki o yumruyu yutkunarak bast\u0131r\u0131yor.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Nurcan\u2019\u0131n su\u00e7u, bir arkada\u015f\u0131n\u0131n borcuna kefil olmas\u0131yd\u0131. K\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir\u00a0kasaba, herkes birbirini tan\u0131r. \u201cS\u00f6z senettir,\u201d derler ya, Nurcan da \u00f6yle\u00a0d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc. Ama bor\u00e7 \u00f6denmedi, evraklar kar\u0131\u015ft\u0131, birileri yalan s\u00f6yledi\u00a0ve Nurcan kendini demir parmakl\u0131klar\u0131n ard\u0131nda buldu. Avukat\u0131, \u201cBu i\u015f\u00a0\u00e7\u00f6z\u00fcl\u00fcr,\u201d dedi, ama \u00fc\u00e7 y\u0131l ge\u00e7ti, h\u00e2l\u00e2 bir umut \u0131\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131 yok. Nurcan, umudu\u00a0kaybetmemeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yor, ama bazen, hele b\u00f6yle gecelerde, o umut bir\u00a0iplik kadar ince oluyor. \u00d6yle ya \u00e7eken bilir, g\u00f6ren ya\u015fayan bilir.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">G\u00f6r\u00fc\u015f g\u00fcnleri hem kurtulu\u015f hem i\u015fkence. Ay\u015fe, \u00e7ocuklarla geliyor, ama\u00a0her ziyaret bir b\u0131\u00e7ak gibi kesiyor Nurcan\u2019\u0131n y\u00fcre\u011fini. Mert art\u0131k pek\u00a0konu\u015fmuyor. \u0130lk geldi\u011finde babas\u0131na sar\u0131l\u0131r, \u201c\u00c7\u0131kacan de mi?\u201d derdi.\u00a0\u015eimdi ise sadece ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 sall\u0131yor, g\u00f6zlerini yere dikiyor. Nurcan, o\u011flunun\u00a0b\u00fcy\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc, ama bu b\u00fcy\u00fcmenin \u00f6fkeyle, k\u0131rg\u0131nl\u0131kla oldu\u011funu biliyor.\u00a0\u201cHakl\u0131s\u0131n, o\u011flum,\u201d diye ge\u00e7iriyor i\u00e7inden, \u201cBaban burada, sense orda,\u00a0\u00e7aresiz. Hakl\u0131s\u0131n.\u201d<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Zeynep ise h\u00e2l\u00e2 babas\u0131na ko\u015fuyor. K\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck kollar\u0131yla sar\u0131l\u0131yor, \u201cBaba, ne\u00a0zaman gelcen?\u201d diye soruyor. Nurcan, her seferinde ayn\u0131 yalan\u0131 s\u00f6yl\u00fcyor:\u00a0\u201cYak\u0131nda, prensesim. Az kald\u0131.\u201d Ama Zeynep\u2019in g\u00f6zlerindeki o saf inan\u00e7,\u00a0Nurcan\u2019\u0131 hem \u0131s\u0131t\u0131yor hem yak\u0131yor. \u00c7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131n b\u00fcy\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc g\u00f6rmek\u00a0g\u00fczel, ama bu b\u00fcy\u00fcmenin bir cezaevinin g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015f odas\u0131nda olmas\u0131 kahrediyor\u00a0onu.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Bir keresinde, Zeynep bir resim getirmi\u015fti. K\u00e2\u011f\u0131d\u0131n ortas\u0131nda bir ev, evin\u00a0\u00f6n\u00fcnde d\u00f6rt ki\u015fi: Ay\u015fe, Mert, Zeynep ve Nurcan. G\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fcnde g\u00fcne\u015f, evin\u00a0\u00fcst\u00fcnde bir g\u00f6kku\u015fa\u011f\u0131. Nurcan, o resmi ko\u011fu\u015fun duvar\u0131na asm\u0131\u015ft\u0131. \u0130smail,\u00a0\u201cBu ne g\u00fczel resim, baba,\u201d demi\u015fti bir g\u00fcn. Nurcan sadece g\u00fcl\u00fcmsemi\u015f, ama\u00a0i\u00e7i parampar\u00e7a olmu\u015ftu. O resim, onun hem umudu hem yaras\u0131n\u0131\u00a0g\u00f6steriyordu c\u00fcmle aleme.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Nurcan, foto\u011fraf\u0131 yast\u0131\u011f\u0131n alt\u0131na geri koyuyor. G\u00f6zlerini kapat\u0131yor, ama\u00a0uyku gelmiyor. Zihninde, eski g\u00fcnler d\u00f6n\u00fcp duruyor. Mert\u2019le bal\u0131k\u00a0tutmaya gittikleri o pazar sabahlar\u0131, Zeynep\u2019in, bah\u00e7ede ko\u015farken d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcp\u00a0dizini kanatt\u0131\u011f\u0131, ama a\u011flamadan babas\u0131na sar\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131 anlar. Ay\u015fe\u2019nin, ak\u015fam\u00a0yemeklerinde \u201cNurcan, bu pilav niye b\u00f6yle?\u201d diye tak\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131, ama sonra\u00a0g\u00fclerek sofray\u0131 toplad\u0131\u011f\u0131 ak\u015famlar. Hepsi, sanki d\u00fcn gibi. Ama ayn\u0131\u00a0zamanda, sanki bir \u00f6m\u00fcr \u00f6nceymi\u015f gibi.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Hapishanede zaman tuhaf bir \u015fey. Bazen bir saat, bir \u00f6m\u00fcr gibi ge\u00e7iyor. Bazen bir y\u0131l, bir g\u00f6z k\u0131rpmas\u0131 gibi. Nurcan, ilk geldi\u011finde g\u00fcnleri sayard\u0131. Ama sonra b\u0131rakt\u0131. Sayman\u0131n bir anlam\u0131 yoktu. Sayd\u0131k\u00e7a, sadece eksik olan\u0131 hat\u0131rl\u0131yordu: \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131n kahkahalar\u0131, Ay\u015fe\u2019nin s\u0131cak elleri, evinin kokusu hi\u00e7 gitmiyordu g\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcn \u00f6n\u00fcnden.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Ko\u011fu\u015fun penceresinden d\u0131\u015far\u0131 bak\u0131yor. K\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck, demir parmakl\u0131kl\u0131 bir\u00a0pencereydi bu. G\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fc g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcyor, ama y\u0131ld\u0131zlar bile soluk burada. Yine\u00a0de Nurcan bak\u0131yor. \u201cAy\u015fe,\u201d diye f\u0131s\u0131ld\u0131yor, \u201cDayan\u0131yo musun?\u201d Sanki Ay\u015fe\u00a0onu duyacakm\u0131\u015f gibi. Sanki o da ayn\u0131 anda, kasabadaki k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck evlerinin\u00a0penceresinden g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fcne bak\u0131yormu\u015f gibi.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Nurcan, su\u00e7suz oldu\u011funu biliyor. Ama bu bilgi, bazen bir teselli, bazen bir\u00a0lanet. Su\u00e7suzsun, ama buradas\u0131n. Su\u00e7suzsun, ama \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n babas\u0131z\u00a0b\u00fcy\u00fcyor. Su\u00e7suzsun, ama kar\u0131n her gece yast\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 \u0131slat\u0131yor. Nurcan, bu\u00a0d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnceleri kovmak i\u00e7in ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 sall\u0131yor. \u201cDayan, Nurcan,\u201d diyor kendi\u00a0kendine. \u201cDayan, bitecek bu.\u201d<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Birden, ko\u011fu\u015fun kap\u0131s\u0131nda bir ses. Gardiyan, \u201cNurcan, mektup var,\u201d diyor.\u00a0Nurcan \u015fa\u015f\u0131r\u0131yor. Bu saatte mektup mu? Kalk\u0131yor, titreyen ellerle zarf\u0131\u00a0al\u0131yor. Ay\u015fe\u2019nin yaz\u0131s\u0131. Zarf\u0131 a\u00e7arken kalbi \u00f6yle h\u0131zl\u0131 at\u0131yor ki, sanki\u00a0g\u00f6\u011fs\u00fcnden f\u0131rlayacak. Mektup k\u0131sa, ama her kelime bir ok gibi saplan\u0131yor\u00a0y\u00fcre\u011fine:<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">\u201cNurcan\u2019\u0131m, \u00e7ocuklar uyudu, ben yaz\u0131yorum. Mert bug\u00fcn \u2018Babam niye\u00a0gelmiyo?\u2019 dedi, susturdum, ama i\u00e7im yand\u0131. Zeynep resmini duvara ast\u0131,\u00a0\u2018Babam g\u00f6rs\u00fcn,\u2019 dedi. Nurcan, ben dayan\u0131yorum, ama sensiz bu ev so\u011fuk.\u00a0Avukat, yeni bi duru\u015fma olabilirmi\u015f, dedi. Umutlanmak istemiyorum, ama\u00a0umut da b\u0131rakm\u0131yo pe\u015fimi. Seni seviyorum. Hep sevece\u011fim. Ay\u015fe\u2019n.\u201d<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Nurcan, mektubu g\u00f6\u011fs\u00fcne bast\u0131r\u0131yor. G\u00f6zleri doluyor, ama bu sefer\u00a0g\u00f6zya\u015flar\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcyor. Sessizce, kimseye g\u00f6stermeden a\u011fl\u0131yor. Ama bu\u00a0a\u011flay\u0131\u015f, sadece ac\u0131 de\u011fil. \u0130\u00e7inde bir k\u0131v\u0131lc\u0131m var. Ay\u015fe\u2019nin sevgisi,\u00a0\u00e7ocuklar\u0131n hasreti, o k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck umut \u0131\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131\u2026 Nurcan, o k\u0131v\u0131lc\u0131m\u0131 tutuyor,\u00a0b\u0131rakm\u0131yor.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Yata\u011f\u0131na uzan\u0131yor, mektubu yast\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131na koyuyor. G\u00f6zlerini\u00a0kapat\u0131yor ve bu sefer, uykunun k\u0131y\u0131s\u0131na geldi\u011finde, i\u00e7ine bir huzur\u00a0doluyor. \u201cDayan, Nurcan,\u201d diye m\u0131r\u0131ldan\u0131yor. \u201cOnlar i\u00e7in dayan.\u201d<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Bu duvar tan\u0131d\u0131k, evet. Ama Nurcan biliyor, bir g\u00fcn bu duvarlar y\u0131k\u0131lacak.\u00a0Ve o g\u00fcn, \u00e7ocuklar\u0131na sar\u0131lacak, Ay\u015fe\u2019nin elini tutacak, evinin kokusunu\u00a0i\u00e7ine \u00e7ekecek. O g\u00fcn, bu duvarlar sadece bir an\u0131 olacak. Nurcan, bu\u00a0inan\u00e7la uyuyor. Ve r\u00fcyas\u0131nda, Zeynep\u2019in resmindeki g\u00f6kku\u015fa\u011f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcyor.<\/div>\n<div dir=\"ltr\">Sizlere Gelecekte G\u00f6r\u00fc\u015fmek \u00fczerine Meydan Okuyorum.<\/div>\n<p>Orada G\u00f6r\u00fc\u015felim&#8230;<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Bu duvar tan\u0131d\u0131k bi yerden gene\u2026 Nurcan, ko\u011fu\u015fun so\u011fuk beton duvar\u0131na s\u0131rt\u0131n\u0131 dayam\u0131\u015f, g\u00f6zlerini tavana\u00a0dikmi\u015f, \u00f6ylece duruyor. Hani bazen insan bir \u015feye bakar da asl\u0131nda hi\u00e7bir\u00a0\u015fey g\u00f6rmez ya, i\u015fte o halde. Duvar\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcndeki \u00e7atlaklar\u0131 ezberlemi\u015f\u00a0art\u0131k. Her gece, uykunun k\u0131y\u0131s\u0131na gelip de dalmadan \u00f6nce, o \u00e7atlaklarda\u00a0kayboluyor. Sanki her biri bir yol, her biri d\u0131\u015far\u0131ya, evine, \u00e7ocuklar\u0131na\u00a0uzanan [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":17,"featured_media":103378,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[37],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-103325","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-safak-genc"],"views":552,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mersingazetesi.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/103325","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mersingazetesi.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mersingazetesi.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mersingazetesi.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/17"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mersingazetesi.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=103325"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/mersingazetesi.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/103325\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mersingazetesi.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/103378"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mersingazetesi.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=103325"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mersingazetesi.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=103325"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mersingazetesi.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=103325"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}